Hey, BBCC… I’m not gonna explain to you how I felt the whole way… If you dun understand what you’ve done, then it’s ok… it’s just that, thank you for everything.... thanks for every single moment that we spend together… I never thought things will become like this… I’m sorry… I’m so stingy… I know I never think about you but I have to think about myself… I’m under deep depression because of you… And I’m still doing the same mistakes by thinking of you 24/7…. Hahaha… Guess… I shouldn’t even have met you… I knew when you first kissed me but still I committed myself because I thought things will change… Hahaha… Things changed!!! I changed when you are the one who suppose to change… You never gonna know my feeling because you are just an idiot thinking of yourself… Hahaha… And yea… hahaha… Here it is… It’s over…
5th May2010, early morning, at around2-3pm… I was chatting with my friend... And I told her about you (BBCC)… Dun worry, BBCC… Everything is good… She said I’m an idiot for ignoring you, for replying all your messages like an idiot and yea for keep everything inside me… And she said I’m in love… I told her that I can’t get a chance to tells things properly because end up it hurts a lot and we fight… And you came online… She urged me to tell her everything and explain those situations… As usual u will talk a lot… and something different that day when you were telling you seriously like this guy… guess… it’s not the time to tell you things… You are happy… And I’m not going to spoil anything… I don’t feel like telling ady… It’s time for me to let things go I guess…^^Haha… no words to explain the feeling… Couldn’t explain… like lost something… Hmmmm… I got to find out what actually that feeling is…
BBCC… I want you to know this… Keep this in your mind forever… I told you this things before but you said your ex was so nice and won’t have this kind of thinking… U makes me laugh… But nevermind… it’s my responsibility to tell you this again… guys hate it when you talk about your ex-boyfriend or ex love-interest. I used to cancel all my night plans and spend the whole night with you… we talk stories till we almost fell asleep… u usually talks a lot… I will be listening the whole way… But do you realize that you will be only talking about your ex’s and who you meet and who you think like you and which guy is cute…. Hmmmm…. And lastly, u will tell I’m not going for looks… It’s a schedule ryte… And do you know what? It’s not about jealousy… First time you tell this, I take it… Second time, I took it… Third time, I took it also…. If you gonna repeat the same thing for hundreds and thousands time… How am I supposed to take it??? I’m in front you… Can you please talk about me or atleast something that can make me happy or things that I can give feedback on??? And you will make sure I’m listening to you not… hahaha… Kalpana, if you think I’m jealous, then go ahead... Because I know I’m pissed with things…
Hey, do you know about the two girls rules???? Rules No.1-girls are always correct… Rules No.2- if u thinks they are wrong, please refers to rules No.1… I guess you understand… You never listen to me and my thing properly before… You always say I never think on your shoes… and you say you does… And if you do, what is the big deal??? Coz you never change… Everything is about what you say… I gave out a lot… My energy, my commitment and everything… saddest part is u never change… U says I changed a lot… hahaha… yea… From a ok to ko…
I’m sorry… Not because of what I’ve done or how did I hurt you… I was hunting for truth… I wanted answer… But I know I can’t get from you… So, that night, when I was chatting with you… I actually did show few parts of the conversation to my friend… She could just say pity you, darkangel... She is the one who asked me to explain everything to you and she is the one who say pity you, darkangel... She told something that it’s repeated in my life for twice… She said I’m a good guy and will get a better girl and BBCC is just someone that I can’t get along… Damn funny… What I’ve been done for past one year with her then???
The blog is going too long… I have to stop… Things just done… Still remember the message that you send before I lie to you that I want to sleep… u said… oh. Ok then. Sorry I kept talking about myself. N thanks 4 listening.tc.nite dei. Sweet dreams (5th may 2010, 05:00am)… lol… BBCC, now only u know???? And the next day, u apologizes again… Hey, what’s the point??? U said I used to be a good listener and now I’m not… And I have to tell you that I suffered that much because I was a good listener… And now, I really don’t care… Don’t even bother… But I admit I’m still thinking about you 24/7… But it just a fool of myself… I gonna stop…
This is my last word to you… I don’t care if you cry or anything… I know you are strong enough now…^^ Good… I will pray for your results… And yea… About those guys… Be smart when you take decision k… Don’t suffer later… I bet you cant take anymore suffers… Excel in everything in your life… I don’t wanna be a blocking stone of your happiness… I don’t know you anymore… I got life… and so do you… I don’t care what you want to tell about me to your friends… You think I’m an idiot or chicken or whatever… Go ahead!!! I dun care!!! You do ask why I’m so good with Chinese but not Indian... hahaha… it’s because of things that you won’t understand… You still a small and pathetic thinking kid… Before things end, want you to know that you are too sweet to me… thanks a lot… it was so nice of you…^^ Millions of thanks, BBCC…
When you read finish, we r done… just D-O-N-E!!!!(The decision I took on 5thMay2010, 04:56am…)
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