Black Sky

Black Sky

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Weyh…. This is for you….

Hey… I don’t want anything anymore from you… It’s enough k… You are people that will never understand me… okay… I said I wanna leave you… That’s it… ok... I don’t want to suffer anymore… I cannot control myself… okay… I don’t want to tell anything anymore… I don’t know how to tell… just leave me okay… I give you 2days to remove me from your friend list… thank you… Sorry… I don’t know what else to say… Just let it be as what you said… It’s other way round… Everything looks like my fault now… Everyone said I’m wrong too… That’s why I don’t want to care anymore… Let me take this pain till my death… So what??? It’s my fault… I’m childish… Being like an idiot… Pathetic minded… Because I know if I turn back also no point… You won’t understand… U will continue to be like an idiot… and actually hurt me as you don’t know anything… As you don’t understand anything k… What’s the point you be there for me everytime… you said you know everything about me… WTFish!!! I told you that you won’t understand me… Idiot... Every conversation, you must win and end it… You responsible for every ‘scratch’ you did to me… Time given was not less… But you make it even worse… I told you a lot of time... We fought for so many times... And you said you went up think back… Then, WTFish actually u changed… You said you will change things to make me happy… Where it went??? Hahaha… Failed!!!!!!!!!!!!!?? And you could say a lot of crap to cover up your things…. Did you care about what I felt everytime?? Did you???!!!

You ask me why I did say sorry… Hahaha… Very good… Because I’m suffering k… Everytime you cry but I got no one to cry to… You want me to make you happy… But there were no other way round… Am I a toy for you??? I’m human, okay… I got feelings… You will want me to listen to you everything… I will listen but deep inside I’m crying because you don’t know how I felt… I want to tell you... I owned feelings too… Why you don’t want to care about me??? And now, I do know how you think exactly… You will wanna tell me that you got feelings too… haiz…

Deyh… You were talking like as though I don’t want things to be good… Do you still remember our 2nd semester break…? Although I deleted all those messages, it’s still clearly in my mind… Did you actually do as what you said…? I gave chances till the end… but nothing happened right… If I could ask you few question now, can you answer after you think properly and professionally…? The question is if I did ask for forgiving me for what I’ve done now, do you think things will be alright??? If I didn’t take this decision, will you ever know what I felt?? You know we got problem… but you would only settle when you want to settle… That’s cool… WTFish… You gonna tell it was exam time and this and that… ok… What happened after exam??? I was waiting for you all the time to come and talk to me about the problems… You never turn up… For your information, I waited like an idiot!!!!

Do you want to ask me why I’m telling this everthing at once and end up everything at once??? Here is the answer… My answer would be a question… Did you ever listen to my problems properly when I tell you?? For me, I told you a lot of time… I told you one by one… I hope and thought you will actually change yourself and understand me… Hahaha… I think I’m biggest noob here… Small things become so big and when I tell you, you could just never take it seriously… And now when it’s too big, and when I’m crying everyday and when the scar in my heart is so big, did you even realize that??? You cannot even realize this big thing… Hahaha… You said you cared for me more than anyone… lol… Hahaha… Hahaha..T.T Great deyh… You cared your very best I guess… but I no longer can take it… And now what you gonna say??? Are you gonna say that you actually faced worst things before in your life and I making small things big??? Hahaha… Just tell… That’s the last things I can listen to now…

You said you can’t believe i just walked pass that way yesterday… And for this you came up with a mind that you wanna leave me??? So, how many times I should have leaved you??? You said u cared for me the most… Can I doubt it now??? Do you know what I feeling now?? Come on!!! You are older... You know you went through so many things before… That’s your stupid move… great… I’m doubting whether whatever you told before about yourself is real now… In my blog, I said I will try my very best… And I need time… Did you see how demanding are you…? All this while, age was a problem between us too… You pressed me so down because your power as you are older… And thanks… Don’t denial because this is the truth… And I believe I told you before about this and eventually you talked something and shut my mouth…

I know you sick of me too… Thanks… Be great in your life… Do what you suppose to do… You know what… I feel damn pity towards you… Because you didn’t know that you hurt me so much... I know how truthful you were to me… I believed you more than my life… I gave everything to you… I did my very best to you… I believe I did so much for you… And you did your part as well… I’m not expecting anything from you anymore now… Just want to thanks you for whatever you done for me… Thank you to care for me more than anyone… Although it never enough, but thanks for your efforts… I guess you know what to do and I know what to do… Hmmmm… yea… When I saw you next time, I hope I can see you laughing and enjoying your life with your friends… You should understand why I said this… If you don’t know, I’m just so speechless… Hey… kindly remove me from your every friend list(Fb and MSN)… Start not to read my blog as well… Thanks… It would help you a lot… Don’t emo…^^ I know you can do good… Don’t worry… God Bless you… And wish whatever you do after this brings a happy ending… Good luck and lastly… As I said I loved you more than anyone… And this from the bottom of my heart…

I LOVE YOU, YOU IDIOT!!!!


… Can I say “The End” this time???

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